gazpacho...finally

No...I'm still here. I haven't gone anywhere. Well, technically I did. I spent a very long weekend last week in Texas for a much needed vacation. As far as I'm aware, I'm here through August when I will finally have a chance to go back and visit Montana (it's been three years!) and escape from the humidity.

I hate to report that I haven't been up to a whole lot. The title of this post relates to last night's activities. Two years ago I asked for, and received, a blender for Christmas because I'd really been wanting to make smoothies and gazpacho. Unfortunately, said blender was held hostage in Texas due to my lack of suitcase space and it being just a little to heavy to justify shipping costs. Realizing the only way I would probably see this blender would be to move back to Texas, I finally bought a new one here several weeks ago.

Last night I made gazpacho from a recipe in a Mediterranean cookbook, out of many recipes for it that I have and all are slightly different, and it was wonderful! I was a little hesitant about how it would turn out. I had a freak weird skin-allergic reaction to the last soup I tried making because of the chili peppers (it was some Thai coconut soup). Nothing went wrong last night, except for my lack of only having one large container for the unblended soup and dividing the blended portions up into two smaller containers.

I bought some extra ingredients to try this chilled almond soup when I finish all my gazpacho. Not quite sure how that one will taste. But I hope to make more gazpacho throughout the summer, possibly trying the other recipes and seeing which one I like best.

Sorry for the prosaic post. I'm trying to think up a title for my short story right now while editing and also reading an incredible novel. I'll post later about my trip and will probably also post about this novel when I finish.

james bond and aston martins

On my way to work this morning I saw it, the thing that makes my heart flutter and turn my head until I'm afraid I'll either run into a mailbox or can no longer see it. And no, I'm not talking about all the adorable little puppies that make me grin on the street and wish I had one (until I remember that this would require me taking it out in the middle of the coldest days in Washington). Yes...I am talking about: a car.

But not just any car. A sleek, shiny, new, gleaming black Aston Martin, the car that glides through the streets as smoothly as a shark glides through the ocean currents.

I should probably state for the record that I am not a car person. Yes, I do know how to drive a standard (and love it and may never go back to an automatic if I can help it), and I do like driving fast on near empty highways or down through the curving rocky mountains of my sweet Southern Californian roads. But I couldn't get technical and I normally don't care about horsepower, or turbo charged engines, or whatnot.

Corvettes, yeah, I like them. BMWs, take 'em or leave 'em, Ferraris...quite beautiful but they don't make my heart flutter. But Aston Martins can make me stop in my tracks. Hummers...no thanks.

Maybe it's the James Bond thing. Maybe it's the dream to live a fast, adventurous life full of mystery and drama and intrigue. Maybe it's the same reason why so many people order a martini, "shaken, not stirred" even if they're not a martini fan. I don't even think it's a status symbol because not many people tend to really think of them or notice them.

Some people have a rabbits' foot or charm bracelets to make it a good day. Others make a wish for a good day by kissing the clasp on their necklace when it reaches the front. I have my Aston Martin sightings.

Ah...it's going to be a good day.

thoughts from friday night

Sometimes you have to wonder if you're doing the right thing.

I'm writing this sitting on the steps just below Lincoln, looking at a dark reflecting pool with two Washingtons and Capitols, lit up brilliantly against an almost dark sky. I see flickers of flash splatter against the stone steps, only no music except what is filtered through my iPod that only I can hear.

I left and went out walking after a long day at the office, again questioning what I was doing, where I was and where I was going. After an hour I found myself walking through the snow of dying blossoms, blown from their perches by a faint whisper of the wind and coloring the sidewalks in pinks and yellows.

I'm sitting down now, relishing the tingling in my legs, the coolness and the amazing lack of people on an incredible spring night. I feel I could be content to just watch the ripples, the blurring of the edges of the Washington while your eyes flow up to the base of a sturdier version.

Moments like this, I realize, I live for. Pure contentment where so much doesn't matter. Just myself, this wind and these legacies...these giants of American history.

I may not know if what I'm doing is right. But I have moments that feel so right. And even though I know I will eventually move on, most likely for somewhere with a warmer winter climate, I will always have these moments.

I'm not sure I'd trade that for all the other unknowns.

summer

Today I bought a bag of tortilla chips with a hint of lime and some salsa. By the one, one of (out of many) things I miss about the great big grocery stores of...well, I guess the suburbs but I haven't been in one that matches North Texas yet, is the salsa selection. There are just a few kinds, and only mild and medium. What happened to hot? I'm a Southern girl...I'd like my salsa hot, thank you.

So I've had a few of this delicious concoction, and...I reallly miss my old house. What I'd like to be doing right about now is mixing up some margaritas, grilling some vegetables for fajitas and quesadillas, then sitting out on a patio next to the pool and enjoying the setting sun, maybe with my Brazilian remixed CD playing in the background. Doesn't that just make you crave the lazy days of summer?

I know. Once we get that...we'll be complaining about the humidity. But I'm sure there could be a few days where there might be some dryness in the air. If that's the case, then I suggest chips and salsa somewhere or up on some rooftop. I'll have to look into when I'm down in Texas for an upcoming long weekend (I'm counting down the days).

PS: If you're a little behind on your classic TV dramas/soap operas...that picture would be one of Dallas, good old Big D.

things you need in an existentialist crisis

Aveda tea, for one (something I dubbed the nectar of the gods in college and still think of it as such) and a city like DC.

I've been fighting writer's block, career goal questions, other very important things that I don't seem to have figured out but that have all been gnawing on me for some time. I left to head down to Borders in Metro Center and ended up not going there at all. I ended up diverting my path somewhere along Logan's Circle, heading wherever the traffic lights took me and ended up walking through Shaw towards the Convention Center.

There was a breeze and the sun was just beginning to set with all the lights slowly turning on and brightening. As I walked up towards Chinatown on 7th Street, I almost got a West Coast vibe of a calm city close to the beach, maybe on the outskirts of San Francisco (I think that had to do with the brilliant sun from earlier and the cool breeze passing through the buildings as I walked). Without even thinking about them, my cares sort of just slipped away as I got caught up in my music and the city lights.

I think my favorite was leaving Chinatown and heading up E street. I happened to look down and see a framed view of the National Archives lit up. I don't think I've seen that building at dusk before. I highly recommend it.

And then...I got a little seed of an idea. First the ending came to me, in a vision, and then the opening line of a short. A few more blocks brought a few more sentences. I skipped my originally planned bookstore trip, and it may have been too late anyway, and hurried home. I couldn't wait to get back to my waiting screen and hear the click-clacking of keys as I finally felt somewhat productive again. Those pressing questions before? I'll figure them out. It'll happen.

Oh, and the tea comes in after I got home. Mmmm...sitting here with Tchaikovsky, the windows open and Aveda tea. I'm telling you...this stuff is that sweet nectar brought up to Olympus (and there is no caffeine or sugar added).

Paul Revere

This is probably my last "poetry" post since April ends next Monday. I had hoped to have more, but it's been an incredibly busy period at work and I barely have time for my own writing/editing. This week will be much more calm, but I've got something going on almost every day after work (mostly writing/reading-related activities, which is nice). Anyway, after this it'll be back to my DC experiences.

I've just finished reading a book that mentioned, very briefly, at the end Longfellow's Paul Revere's Ride. This is another poem I have loved ever since I can remember. I've always loved history, but growing up I particularly loved the revolutionary era in American history. Maybe it was romanticism on my part, but the writing that came about during that period speaks volumes of the genius of those men and no matter how many times we read them, hear them or memorize them, just having them on the tip of the tongue gives me chills (yes Mr. Jefferson, I am talking about your work).

This poem is no different. Even though it was written much after that period, it still evokes similar reactions...at least in me. The opening lines are mesmerizing, and for whatever reason, I always hear them spoken in a whisper. It's got such a smooth, steady cadence. Even though this was one I never had to memorize for a class, the opening stanza is burned in my memory.

What a great way to learn history! Things like this stay with you, poetry, music, etc. I remember in one class I knew the answer to a question about Istanbul because of a They Might Be Giants song. And who hasn't been in a class when someone brings up the answer because of the Simpsons? (I've never been a Simpsons fan, but I have heard a reference in many class).

Ok...go out and enjoy this beautiful weather. It's so wonderful to see sunshine again and to feel it. Maybe take a book of poetry out to one of the many little parks around? Not a bad way to spend a Sunday afternoon.

death of an icon

I posted a link elsewhere to the Kurt Vonnegut news article around 6:45am Thursday morning before heading off to a breakfast program at work. That early I didn't have time to say more about it, and I kept meaning to do so. The only thing that held me back was...where do you begin? Vonnegut had achieved such stature that most writers can perhaps only dream of. And his books, while enjoyable and entertaining, had much more substance to them than many on the shelves and front tables do today. He was a living writer up there in the ranks of Twain, Hemingway and Heller in that he was read year after year by countless students.

It's with a little regret that I say it's been quite some time since I've read any Vonnegut. Several years, and only two books. His were books that I always went to the bookstore and scanned over and just always said I'd come back to pick them up another day. I don't feel right with talking about my favorite scene or discussing the ways in which his writing made me feel or moved me. He did of course make an impression.

With the internet, it was incredible to see how quickly news of his death spread across the virtual world and whispered across everyone's lips: "did you hear?" "this morning I saw..." "have you listened to the news today?"

Thank you, Mr. Vonnegut, for your wisdom, your words, your satire, for the people you have inspired and for your library of work that will continue to entertain and educate. You will be, and already are, missed.

Le Dormeur du Val (The Sleeper in the Valley)

My next poem is Le Dormeur du Val (The Sleeper in the Valley), by Arthur Rimbaud. I first read this poem, in French, Junior year in high school for my independent study class. This was one of five poems we had to memorize, and which I do still have memorized. What I remember most is how...animated my teacher was when discussing this poem. The main thing I remember about the language was the word "trou," which basically translates to hole.

The poem starts off very pleasantly, with the image of a sun-dappled valley. Next to a river lies a soldier, at first seeming at rest and peacefully sleeping there in the sunlight. Except...one thing: "Souriant comme / Sourirait un enfant malade." "Smiling like a sick child would smile." Despite the sunlight shining down on him, he's cold. We see then that he's unable to enjoy the surrounding valley, the flowers and the light. The last line we learn that there are two red holes in his side.

That's where the word "trou" comes in. The valley is a "trou," a hole in the mountains. Then at the end, the last line, there are two "trous," two holes in his side. My professor loved the way Rimbaud was able to tie the first and the last line together with that one word, and also the way the two had such vastly different meanings and atmospheres to them. It's one thing that really made me understand that translations can never really get the full meaning across. The English translation I've linked uses the word "hole," but I don't the other translation that I first read did. Now whenever I read Neruda or Guillen, no matter how beautiful those poems are, I just have to wonder what I'm missing.

The language Rimbaud uses is beautiful and it just flows, almost like a whisper, when read aloud. The image is created so perfectly inside the mind as each line is read, building to that final moment where the dead soldier sleeps, returning to the nature that now cradles him. The English translation is ok, but if you can read the French, it's absolutely beautiful. Or just have someone read it to you and close your eyes and listen to the delicate cadence.

national poetry month

April is National Poetry Month. I've been meaning to post something for the past week but have been a little busy. I grew up on poetry and even though I have no recollection of my first poem, I do remember being little and loving Longfellow's poem about Paul Revere. I've always been a big history nerd, so that was just a great way to combine two things I love: poetry and history. Even though I've read, and written, poetry for as long as I can remember, I wanted to post about one poem I remember falling hard for. It was in my AP English class senior year, which I'm now thankful I took because I don't think the other English classes had an emphasis on poetry.

The poem is A Valediction: Forbidden Mourning by John Donne. This was the first time I'd read Donne but it would instantly catapualt him upon among my ever-growing list of favorite poets. First of all, it was the image of the compass that made it so unique. Love poems generally have similar elements: love, flowers, roses in particular, etc., but what a great image! A connection that is constantly there, even when you're apart, miles away, and how he sees his wife as 'the fixed foot,' that he feels connected to while away and calls him home again. And the fact that he talks of how their love is so strong that absence will not make a distance, they will not grow apart. Going back to the compass analogy, it's made of metal...solid and ever-lasting. That's what their love is.

Secondly the language is just beautiful, calling back to a time where romance really was part of the language. Can you even imagine getting a poem such as this today? It's so...even though the words are very refined and soft, especially when spoken aloud, it's a very passionate poem.

Throughout the rest of April I'm going to try to post links to poems that I love or that have touched me in some way, some I'm sure are very popular and probably have been studied very much in college, but maybe some will be a little less well-known.

What are some of your favorite poems?

is this normal...anywhere?

Today I woke up to see snow on the roof and fence around a building behind me. Snow. Less than a week after 80 degree weather. This is freakish...this is Texas weather. Weather where it changes drastically in less than 24 hours. I wondered if this was normal anywhere in the world...except maybe Montana.

Last night I was on the phone with my Mom, complaining about my dashed dreams now that the weather had turned cold again and forced me back inside (and forced me to turn my heat back on). She pointed out that it snowed the first April we had in Texas. I don't remember that, but she says she has pictures. But I don't remember snowing the other twenty years in April I lived there. Some people blame global warming for the odd weather...but if it snowed in April twenty years ago...well...then either you can't blame global warming or it's been going on a lot longer than we thought. Maybe with a break in between.

The good news is that I got a lot of writing done last night, which was wonderful. Pages of it. It's been awhile since I've sat down and written so much because I've been so busy, and next week will be pretty busy too. It looks like much of the snow has already melted, and I'm debating on heading back down to look at the cherry blossoms again. I have to say thanks again to a certain law student who bought me a scarf and a hat to keep me warm. I'd already packed away my other scarves and hadn't yet had a chance to pack these away. Funny the way some things work out.

I'll admit I'm looking forward to another evening in with a huge mug of vanilla cappuccino and some great music and my laptop. I forsee many more pages being written tonight. So I guess I do have Easter plans. Happy Easter (to those celebrating it)!

rediscovering d.c.

I've covered miles this past weekend in the district. It has been too wonderful to not be outside. Friday night I walked from Shaw with, quite possibly, a huge grin on my face. There was a cool breeze that kept me from being too warm while walking quickly home, and with that breeze came the faint scent of honeysuckle, a scent that I remember from my old house in Dallas when we used to bike out in the street past honeysuckle vines snaking up the alley fences. It's that scent that says spring to me perhaps more than anything else.

At least, until I moved out here. Now cherry blossoms will truly signal spring to me. Last year I remember visiting the last weekend, when the blossoms fell down like snow with the slightest whisper. Yesterday I was down at the tidal basin where the blossoms are still white and still budding. Even there, occasionally, I caught honeysuckle. Or maybe I just imagined it...pretended it was there to weave my springtime sensations.

The Japanese enjoy cherry blossoms because their bloom is so fleeting and so beautiful. Beauty and life are fleeting, and the cherry blossoms are a reminder to seize that, to take time and enjoy that which is fleeting. Carpe Diem, as Robin Williams so immortalized. "Seize the Day boys. Make your lives extraordinary."

When we're not working 40+ hours a week, our minds are still back on work and how we can get more and get ahead, to get there. But where is there? Where's the destination? Is it a certain title, the proverbial corner office? One thing I often find myself wondering is how many times am I going to look back and wish I'd done other things, or done the things I only think about: taking the plunge and jetting off for a week in Paris, finally walking through the historical streets of Boston during a weekend away that I never quite seem to take, putting trust in someone, telling people the things you always think and want to say but never do, learning a new language (or revisiting the three I've studied), planning dinner parties around my coffee table...who cares if it's Bohemian?

So even though it's that time of year and the grassy paths around the monuments are packed with tourists, I hope you take time out to enjoy the fleeting beauty of the cherry blossoms and the scent of honeysuckle. Forget about work for an hour while walking down there. Your peace of mind will thank you.

I know you'll see me down there.

locals vs. foreigners

DC is an interesting place. It's always in flux, constantly changing and changing beyond every four years. As a Washingtonian, I'm not aware of dislike of "foreigners," whether from Texas, California, Kansas, the other Washington, or France, Ghana, Argentina, China. Some may feel differently around tourist season when the population of the district swells exponentially, but overall...we recognize this place is pretty transient and generally go with the flow. I think I have met only two born and raised locals. Maybe.

The reason I bring this up? For an article that my Father pointed out to me, "Californians blamed for spoiling West." I don't think he was pointing it out to me because of my "Californian ways," but more because he was quoted in it. Him and his website Montana Sucks. In this article, locals are upset when 'foreigners' move in and change things. I hear those from Florida are getting upset about New Yorkers elbowing their way in, and despite the fact that California is one of the most populated states, their population is still managing to annoy the rest of the country.

Now...a little disclaimer. I don't say 'annoy' because they annoy me. I'm using that generally. Some of my best friends are Californian...and I do have a little bit of that California attitude after living there for four years. I've joked to people during vacations from school about how "oh, well, I must be turning into a Californian," since they were about the complete opposite of a Texan. With that being said...I'm almost certain I'll end up in Texas. Sure, California's great, Boston's great in the spring and Virginia's got some gorgeous places...but I'm not sure you can take the Texas out of the girl. I tried when I first left.

So. Despite the US being a melting pot, it seems it may be more of a pot filled with water and oil, with each portion wanting to remain on its side. We're all set in our ways, and certianly don't want those crazy Westerners/Northerners/Southerners changing things! I've even caught mysefl in Washington thinking, "in Texas, this would be different." But honestly, can you blame the oil for wanting to mix?

Take the above photo. Beautiful. And that was in May before the sun really came out. Even a tried and true urban girl like me misses that place and loved being out there. I'm almost counting down the days where I can go back and visit Flathead Lake and...well...and do nothing up there in the mountains and just look at how incredibly green the trees are, or falling asleep while the boat rocks on a lake the size of an ocean (to my urban eyes).

Oh wait...I'm sorry. I forgot. Montana sucks. Everyone should just stay where they are. It's a horrible place full of...of...hmmm. Well, there's no urban landscape there. No mass pollution, cars with a permanent weight on their hands. There we go.

vincent van gogh

I spent the early part of the afternoon down at the National Gallery today. I went mainly to see the photography exhibition: Paris in Transition, which did have some pretty cool photographs. I recommend checking it out while it's here. There were a couple of Stieglitz's photographs there, especially this one taken in the rain in Paris that he had printed on a paper used for watercolors in order to get a texture on the print to make it actually look a little wet.

Anyway...the title of my post is not Paris in Transition, so I'll get to the point. I'm currently reading a collection of Vincent van Gogh's letters, which is actually pretty fascinating. On a side note, I didn't know that in his early years, before he started painting, he actually thought of becoming a pastor and went through a pretty religious period. And also that the myth isn't true, that he didn't only sell one work during his lifetime. And for whatever reason, I was under the impression he cut off his ear because of a woman, but it turns out it was after an argument with Gauguin.

The security guard who glanced through my bag saw my book on van Gogh and suggested I check out the Impressionist collection upstairs, which I have seen before. And I thought "eh...maybe, if there's time." I ended up going up to look at them and saw three (there were more, but these were the first ones I saw) van Gogh pieces next to each other. The one if the middle, something along the lines of flower fields in Holland, looked more realistic than something say...his "Starry Night." And I thought, this must have been done before he went to Paris.

The next painting was of an olive field during a harvest, and it was down in the sharp, thick strokes of the van Gogh we all know and love. This, I began to think, had to have been done after his trip to Paris and the south of France when he met the Impressionists. I checked the dates: The first painting was done in 1883. The second was 1890. In his letters, I'm currently finishing up the year 1888, and he's mentioned his idea of painting a starry night.

It was kind of cool to have all that background info and to be able to apply it while looking at art. I don't think it was really analyzing, but it really helped me to see how he progressed, and then of course I wondered what his painting would be like had he not gone to France. You can also sense the color change too. His colors in the later years were much more vibrant, and he comments about this in his letters to his brother, how in Holland the color scheme is more grey, and then in France they're much brighter.

I will be buying more artist biographies now. I have a biographical novel of Michelangelo in my to-read pile, but I have two more books I have to read first. Let me know what you think of the photography exhibition if you like it. And also...I love that the NGA has so many Monets. They're beautiful!

'california dreamin''

Weather like this makes me wish I was back in California. As I walked to work this morning, all I wanted was to be in my car (which sadly I no longer own...and very much miss it) driving through the mountains of Southern California with my windows down, Placebo, Opus III or DJ Sammy on the stereo and a trip to the Starbucks on Orange for my iced soy chai that I can then enjoy on the patio with the mountains in the background...especially when the weather's like this and they're still snow-tipped.

I may have to take some "sick" time this afternoon if it remains sunny. I will be spending much time outside this weekend. How did I ever think I liked cold weather and night best?

Oh...yeah...when we had over 30 days in a row of temperature over 100. No one should have to be put through that.

Anyone else with me? Let's take our laptops and go work outside. I may not have my mountains or my car, but I can at least still have my iced soy chai and a patio table.

spring break and st. patrick's day

Though I have not yet come to terms with the fact that I will not ever have a spring break again, unless I do decide to go to law school (but even then I will still be working) I have to admit that this past week has felt a little like a break. This is probably due to the late nights and the fact that I had a chance to play tour guide. I love playing tour guide because I'm reminded of how great this city is. Take the monuments. I don't go down to see them very often and every time I go, I remember just how incredible and incredibly moving they are and vow to make it a point to return. Soon.

And then I don't usually.

But I am promising that again. And I will try to make a point to keep that promise. The cherry blossom festival will happen soon, so that's at least one more time that I will make much effort to go down to the Mall.

One other cool thing, while I'm on the topic of the Mall and then on to St. Patrick's Day, but on Tuesday I got to walk in the reflecting pool. It was drained, as were all the fountains (which was a bad thing, in particular with WWII), and at first I didn't want to walk in it as some were doing because it felt almost disrespectful. But as a tourist group of loud high school students surrounded and overtook my friend and me, I felt the need to escape, so we stepped down in the reflecting pool, taking glances back at the Washington Monument and the Capital building in the very center of my line of vision, along with Lincoln in front of us.

Anyway. St. Patrick's Day was great. This year I spent it in a city/country where it's kind of a big deal. Especially if, like me, you're Irish. So I woke up early after a late night dancing (Happy Birthday A!), with some incredible pizza that I think I may still be craving, to make Irish soda bread. I have not made this in over a decade, so who knew how it was going to turn out. My Irish ancestors must have been looking down on me because it was wonderful. I actually have a picture of it, but that may have to wait until I take some more pictures and get my film developed (I know...and I don't want to hear it).

Later that day I joined some friends at Biddy Mulligan's for some drinks. The good conversation more than made up for waiting for about 15 minutes in the bitter cold (although that wasn't too bad either). It was good to hang out with some people I don't normally see. Although it might have been better had they actually been serving their curry fries instead of only what was on their special St. Patrick's Day menu. I guess you can't everything.

And then finally, I went with a friend to a club just outside of NW to see Armin van Buuren. Despite not being able to actually go to the arena (or whatever they call that room) to dance since it was so packed (because it was Armin van Buuren), my friend did manage to score a spot behind the DJ booth where we could dance and keep an eye on our coats. I could have stayed for hours because the music was that good, but I haven't yet broken in my heels and two nights of dancing were really punishing me for all the late nights this week.

It was a really great St. Patrick's Day, if I do say so.

the kindness of strangers

I have been thinking for some time to write a post on how no one smiles in Washington. In my office building when I run into other people on the floor or in the elevator, I'll smile if I catch their eye. Why? Because I'm from Texas and that's what we do. It's nice. It makes your day just a little bit better. Instead of a smile back, I get a straight face or sometime a look that almost says "what is your problem?" My problem is that I don't like being miserable and a friendly smile always brightens the day.

Anyway, that's not what this post is about. Because just when I'm feeling slightly jaded, something happens.

For anyone out in DC this evening, you know that it got cold and very wet. At about 10:30, I found myself in Chinatown about to walk home in the rain. I did it because I didn't think it'd be so bad. After all, I'd just walked from the White House to Chinatown and didn't get very wet. And it's really not a bad walk home.

After a block I could feel my pants getting very wet and my legs getting cold, the top of my hair getting soaked (it wasn't raining hard enough to completely soak my hair, which was good), and the droplets streaming dwon my face. So I decided to do something I rarely do.

I took a cab.

Except...all the cabs that were leaving Chinatown and heading my direction all had people in them. I'm not too far from home now, maybe eight to ten blocks, but a cab would still be nice. And what do you know? One pulled over and asked where I was going. There was a young couple in the backseat, maybe my age, and we chatted for a little about how the cold weather came from nowhere. I don't even know where they were going or how far out of the way I was, but it was nice of them to pull over. I would have gotten an empty cab eventually, because I think one even pulled up behind them, but it was nice to have my faith restored.

And the $6.50 wasn't bad. I thought it'd be double that, but now that I know...I might be more inclined to stay out later in Chinatown and cab it back.

learning to let go

There was an interview over on the BookEnds blog the other day that really struck me. I've been working to try to find the best method of telling my story, without giving up any of the back story. It's the last paragraph when the author talks about how attached to their writing writers get. And this is so true! No matter how much you tell yourself a certain scene slows down pacing, there's always that one line that seems so beautifully crafted that it just has to stay in. And since it can't fit anywhere else, well...looks like that scene's staying.

In my short story, I've found it difficult to let go of the larger story. In the novel, there are more characters, more relationships and the relationships are much more defined. And it's hard, in my mind, to let go of those relationships once the characters are gone. It is very hard, because you work so long on a certain story, a certain direction, that it's difficult to give that all up.

But it works better for the story. And that's what's important. You want to make sure that your story is clear and that all the little nuances fit and work for the reader. They'll work for the writer because the writer has all the back stories that are no longer there. So now I have some decisions to make and many words to write. And the importance of readers (hopefully friends who will be nice since they're critiquing all your loving hours) is illustrated again.

snow

I have to admit, I don't get umbrellas and snow. This may be because I'm from Texas and snow is such a wonderful commodity that I like to enjoy it as it is. Walking hom in the snow today was wonderful. I let the snow collect on my coat and in my hair, with flurries on my eyelashes and yes, maybe I caught one or two flakes on my tongue. I didn't even mind that I could see my breath and that my legs felt frozen through.

Or at least, I didn't mind too much.

Anyway, I will try to post my thoughts on writing that I mentioned previously tomorrow. Even though I loved the snow today, I do hope that this is the last burst of winter. I'm ready to walk all over the city in the sun and to enjoy the warmth again.

spoken too soon

As it turns out, I may have spoken a little early. I walked down to the National Gallery and about froze to death. Part of this was because it was warm the day before, so I wore a light jacket (and thought I was going to be late, so I didn't run back upstairs to get a heavier one). I also, stupidly, figured that once I was in the sun, everything would be ok.

What an idea.

Needless to say, I took the metro home even though taking the metro almost anywhere downtown makes me feel lazy when I have nowhere to be. And apparently there are to be snow flurries middle of this week? I'll be fine as long as it doesn't drop down to 15 degrees again. I also braved the freak cold front to run to the bookstore. I was looking for my book club's new book, but that one was not at the store. So...instead of saving money and not buying anything (what an idea) I ended buying The Agony and the Ecstasy, which is a biographical novel of Michelangelo. I can't remember the author, but I want to say I've heard of this book before.

Right now I'm reading a collection of Van Gogh's letters I picked up over the holidays when I saw a Van Gogh exhibition, so if I do not get my March book, I'll probably start reading about Michelangelo. I do see future book recommendations in the future.

This may be a somewhat meaningless post, except that I did call the freakish cold weather, but I read an interview with a writer recently and something she said really struck me. I intend to post my thoughts on this later this week, and I thought about it even more so yesterday as I had a friend reading my novel-now-short-story and asking about some of the relationships that made a lot of sense in the novel format, and there's just not enough space to explain it in a short story version. But as I said to him, I just...I don't want to change anything that made the characters those people. I like their relationships and how they interact...I can't change that.

But sometimes...you need to sacrifice for your art.

oh sweet, sweet spring

I know it's not technically Spring yet, but last night was quite possibly one of the most beautiful nights in a very long time. And it wasn't just because I went out for sushi for dinner. I could have stayed out walking the city for most, if not all, of the night.

Now, I realize that by saying this some freak cold front is going to come in and the temperature's going to drop to 15 degrees and I'll be stuck inside, not even able to the stockpiles of hot chocolate that I have. But maybe I'll be lucky. Just maybe this wonderful weather will decide to stay for a little and I can go out and once again enjoy the city. I forget how much I love just walking aimlessly around. Haven't done that in some time.

I've had a pretty quiet week at work, but still haven't managed to get my story finished. I've been up almost every night talking to friends until very late so...haven't really had the energy or focus. Until the end of this week. I had Friday afternoon off and I edited a hardcopy (I'm old fashioned and prefer marking up a story to death. It helps me keep my edits straight) and will today transfer those edits to the electronic version.

Maybe it's the change in weather, but I've also had this incredibly strong desire to cook. I have a couple of recipes in mind, so we'll see what the weekend brings.

temptation

It's that time of year again; the time where many of us try to come up with something that's hard to give up, but really...not too difficult. And what about those of us who really have none of the standard vices? I have to admit I was a little stumped for this year. I don't smoke, I don't drink a lot, I don't eat meat, I don't really eat chocolate, I don't drink soda and the one thing that I am addicted to is not feasible for me to give up. And I don't mean in a selfish way. If I were to give up coffee for 40 days, it would not be a pretty 40 days and it would be best if I were holed up in my apartment. The way I would respond to people would not be a good example of "brotherly love," and so I think I'm safe that coffee will not be required of me.

I won't go into everything I've opted to do, since I do think it is more a personal thing, but I do have one question to ask. One thing I did give up, sort of on a whim, was chocolate. Like I said I above, I don't really eat it. I'll go weeks without chocolate because it's not something I crave. Now...with that being said. I walk into work on Wednesday where a box of bite-size brownies from a recent program are sitting out, a dark chocolate bar is sitting in the work-room, along with a box of dark chocolate bars we've had sitting in there and a dish of chocolates from Valentine's Day sitting in the front office. And I admit, without thinking, I almost took a chocolate brownie. But I remembered it was Ash Wednesday and I couldn't for the life of me admit to breaking my Lent on the first day.

So I resisted. But it was so hard since it was no longer a matter of not wanting it, but now it was a matter of not being able to have it (theoretically...because I could and no one but me would ever be the wiser).

And I have no Mardi Gras stories because my exciting last-indulgence was going to class.

national geographic and accumulation

This year for my birthday I asked for, and received, a second year's subscription to my beloved yellow magazine. Last year was the first year I had my own subscription. But I remember being young and we had a cabinet packed full of NGs in our den; they were double stacked on the shelves with more recent issues stacked on top. I used to pour through them learning about whatever I was interested in (at that time it was mainly whales and other sorts of marine biology and Saturn).

Sadly, we got rid of them when selling the house. Who really needs National Geographic from the late 1970s and early 1980s? Most of that information is probably obsolete now, like an issue on the solar system since we know now that those issues would have one planet too many.

On my lower shelf right now I have about 14 issues; one I bought before my subscription started and then 2007's January issue. On my coffee table I have February and March. That's quite a bit of yellow. And I can be quite the packrat, something I'm trying to overcome. So I wonder, is it necessary to keep all these issues? How often am I going to go back and look at the article on "Hawaii's Unearthly Worms?" But if I only keep the issues I'll probably go back and read...well...then I'll have an incomplete set. Are my issues doomed for the trash whenever I move?

As a certified nerd, I love seeing those yellow spines all lined up. I have maybe only gone back to look through one or two issues, but the year's still young.

On a side note: I just read an article that says the Year of the Pig will bring violence, disease and epidemics. Because last year wasn't bad enough. Oh, but children born in this year will be lucky. Personally, I'd rather have a fortuitous year for those of us already in existence.

pulse

In high school I wrote a lot of poetry, and even through the first...three years of college. In college I had a couple of great nights at the open mic night at The Grind. I read a few times, and it's such an incredible rush to be up there reading your work. Your heart races and it's almost all you can hear in your own ears. And when you finish, you find that you're a little out of breath. It was very different than the Writer's Club I was involved in, and my creative writing classes in high school, because you knew everyone there. Reading at The Grind, I maybe only really knew the girls I went with. Rachel really perfected the Open Mic.

Anyway...I have to admit that my flow of poetry has diminished in the past few years. And I'm not sure what it is. I don't think I'm any less inspired. I think maybe it's because for some time, I was so focused on my prose and my novel that I couldn't really think...well, I don't want to say that I couldn't think poetically because I'd like to think that I can infuse some poetry into my prose.

I came across this poem I wrote this past fall that sort of came to me while walking around DC. It's called Pulse, after the pulse that's alive in this city. That's what I love about living in the city; there's so much life here. I love it here. I love the rush of the trains while you stand on the metro platforms, the snowflake lights down around MetroCenter during the holidays, crossing 16th Street and looking down at the White House...and I could go on.

This is nervewracking. I haven't had anyone read my poetry in a very long time (partly since I don't really write it anymore). I've been wanting to go to one down on U Street, but now I have my French class on the same night. Once it finishes in a few weeks, I'll have to start going to check it out. It'll be some time before I read, if ever, but I love the open mic nights. I just love words and hearing them is just as good as reading and writing them. Who knows? Maybe being around all that poetry will get me writing again.

You can let me know if you felt the urge to snap your fingers.

Pulse

October 2006

I feel your pulse along the streets
your brightness against the lamps above
and the rush I feel from you
with every passing vehicle and metro train.
Something alive
and when I'm there on the edge
I feel it too
for a brief fleeting moment
my pulse matching the beat of the street
and the fluttering of dead leaves
you, my city, are not black and white
something teeming here
beneath the surface but not yet in shadows.
I find myself lost amid monuments
to the heroes of the past
knowing you are creating the heroes of tomorrow
with each beat
a motorcade, a protest, a helicopter, a no-fly zone.
The veins feeding down tot he center
and out from the center
feeding me,
feeding life into me
your pulse setting mine.

the frenzy begins...

...and I'm hanging out in my apartment doing laundry and French homework. The Super Bowl frenzy is just beyond me. Yes...I realize it's because I am not a football kind of girl. I'll take my Cowboyz anyday and of course have loyalty to the Stillers, but other than that...eh. I actually kind of forgot it was today (gasp! the horror!)

I have since learned...somewhat. In recent years I have fallen for soccer (football) hard, and love it more than I used to. No idea where this recent passion came from. This past summer was my first World Cup with this new-found love. And it rocked! Up until the end when Italy beat France, which shouldn't have happened. France dominated that game. *ahem* Anyway. Yes, I was a little caught up in the football frenzy then. To anyone who chastises this frenzy, I have to say "Come on! We only get this every four years!"

To those who love the game, I say to you, enjoy. It is a relatively healthy way to get out the aggression that seems to be in our nature. I may not understand it or understand the constant stopping and resetting up, or the accumulation of points, but I enjoy the thrill of it. I had a great time the last Cowboys' game I was at, seeing the stands go wild for America's Team (sorry Washingtonians...I had to say it), and I remember thinking that soccer games would be all the more exciting had America's stands filled up to this capacity for the game, instead of the 1/3 section of the stadium.

Enjoy your camadarie, and your arguments if your best friend likes the other team. I'll understand if your week is ruined if your team loses, but may the best team win. And besides...look on the brightside if you lose: you won't have to wait four more years.

There's always next year.

hemingway

It seems that I've been waxing poetic lately about Hemingway. For some reason he's come up in quite a few recent conversations, and that may be because I recently finished a collection of short stories by him (The Snows of Kilamanjaro is great, especially the title story and the last one).

I just read a short piece of fiction currently up online from a previous issue of a magazine, and I have to say that I'm less than impressed. It's instantly apparent what the subject is, and to be honest, the religious ponderings were a little over the top. I know I'm not some award-winning short story writer, but this piece just kind of...well, I was turned off by it. The piece was about a young, unmarried Christian couple who were supposed to get an abortion, only the girl didn't want to go through with it. There wasn't any dialogue in the story, and it was all laid out in thoughts, which could work but I don't think it did here.

Now I'm also trying to remember, but I don't think he actually mentioned what the "appointment" was, but again, it was pretty clear.

Ok. The reason I'm bringing up Hemingway. I still remember in high school, I think senior AP English, reading Hills like White Elephants by Hemingway. It was about the same thing, but it was never said. It was only alluded to in the most subtle way, and it worked remarkably. It's been years since I read it, but I still have the English book from class and have it with me, and I think later this week I might have to pull it out and reread it. Since it's been some time, I can't quite remember all the techniques that he used.

It's interesting to see a similar idea (a touchy subject) described without really mentioning it, and of course the types of characters and very different settings and see how they play off. I'm going to have to say that Hemingway came out on top. If I can remember that story five, six years later and can remember more than just the unique title, then you know he did something right.

But then again, it is Hemingway.

from long to short

I'm taking the main theme of my novel and I'm going to try rewriting/reworking it as a short story. It's sort of what my novel is worked around, but there have been several times that I think the pacing was sacrificed for length (since there's a standard length for first novels), and I'm wondering if it could be that much more powerful as a short story.

I never really thought of myself as a short story writer, even though there are obvious benefits to it. I wrote a few in high school, but usually I intended to keep those stories from creative writing class assignments and add to them to make novels since I thought the story could continue much more. I also used to not be a fan of short stories, though I'm not sure what it was about them I didn't like.

Last year my cousin gave me a collection and for Christmas I received Hemingway's The Snows of Kilamanjaro. So...wish me luck on this endeavor. I still have numerous pages to finish for my French homework. Is it sad that I'm already counting down the weeks? 9 more left. I wish I could just skip all that and go to the end and see how well my French comes back. I know. Patience is a virtue.

snow!

Yay! It's snowing. I hate when it's cold, but I love it when it snows. Ironic, maybe.

I went out to lunch with a friend because I wanted to go out in the snow, and cold weather calls for hot and spicey Thai food. It makes me so happy, I'm like a little girl again. This is what happens when you grow up in a place where you're lucky if you get snow for a few days each year.

habits

For about 7 or 8 months last year, a few of my friends and I met almost every Sunday to study Indonesian at a Starbucks not quite downtown. We stopped over the summer with people traveling and me deciding I wanted to refocus my language-time on the French that I could tell was slowly slipping away.

There was this...I don't know...family? that used to meet there every Sunday. I usually got there an hour before my friends to read and they were always there before me and almost stayed until we left if not later. They were only two men and a child, but maybe old friends with one who always brought his son or, more what it looked like, his grandson. I'm not sure what language they spoke, but whatever they said, you knew it was funny by how often they laughed.

After a few weeks, I admit that I would sometimes get slightly irritated, particularly when it was just me studying or reading. I know, I was voluntarily going to a public place to study, but almsot everyone else there was studying, reading or watching the close-captioned television. But at the same time, it was nice and my irritation usually diminished. When I was still in California, my friend and I used to go to the same Starbucks for the same drink at least once or twice a week to blow of mid-term and paper steam. I miss that.

So last weekend my friends and I decided to try meeting up again. I'd like to start class again, but will be taking French now on the same night. I walk in early and sit down, when I see a familiar looking kid run past me to the other end fo the Starbucks and then come running back. My first thought, to be honest, is "oh Lord, come on! My mother would have had a fit had I gone running throughout restaurants and cafes (assuming Starbucks was around 20 years ago)." (Side note: as an adult, I appreciate so much what my parents had to put up with...what any parent has to put up with).

When my eyes follow this kid, I see the two older men and recognition dawns. About eight months after I'd last seen them, there they were. Same time, same place, same people. I had to wonder, had they been coming here every Sunday since I was last there? Every Sunday for eight months? At the same time?

Doesn't that get boring? Even in California when I spent so much time studying in cafes, I had to vary it up slightly. Maybe sit outside one day, and then go to Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf another day, then maybe over to Riverside for an evening, or to the only 2am Starbucks we knew of in the area. But maybe that's the only time they get a chance to get together and catch up during the week. Maybe that's the only time these old friends can chat in which case the surrounding doesn't matter.

I think they were there today, although I didn't get a chance to sit and study the other patrons. My Starbucks, alas, was packed and I just got my coffee and came home, my face going numb on the walk back. Even though I love walking in the cold with my steaming vanilla latte, and the warmth each sip provides as it sears the inside of my throat, I'm looking forward to it being warmer again and the outside patio is again an option.

Sunshine I miss you.

book recommendation

This morning I, somewhat hurriedly, finished Pride and Prejudice, and it was wonderful. I've never read any Austen before, and ironically because in my school's advanced placement English classes...we never read what we were suppposed to read. I picked it up to read because I actually highly enjoyed the latest film version with Kiera Knightly. Even knowing the ending, you're just agonizing about the process of getting there. Not in the writing, but just the story. How it seems like...missed opportunities. I'm trying not to say anything in case someone reading this hasn't read it, seen it, or seen Bridget Jones' Diary.

Maybe it's also because secretly we want someone tall, dark and handsome...and brooding to say they "ardently" love us (at least the ladies anyway). And that's also a word I think people should start using again: ardently.

Before seeing the movie, I was always hesitant to read Austen because I thought of her alongside the Bronte sisters, and I have to admit that I very much disliked Wuthering Heights, as much as I wanted to like it. I just couldn't stand Catherine and though she really needed to stand up for herself. It took a lot of effort to get through those pages.

I wish I could say more, but I'm afraid I'll give the story away. I highly recommend reading it, because then I think you'll like the characters in the films even more. Judi Dench does an incredible job of putting Lady Catherine together even though she's only in the film for ten minutes, maximum. Same with Donald Sutherland. He's in the film, but I almost wouldn't say very active, and yet...it's a wonderful performance. Seeing as how it looks like it's finally going to stay cold for some time now, this might be a good time to pick it up and stay inside and read something.

beautiful

Anyone reading this who lives in DC knows how incredibly beautiful it is today. I went out to run some errands and it's just...it's not how I remember last January. I hope this keeps up for a very important holiday coming up in a few weeks (well, important for me).

Unfortunately one of my errands was slightly unsuccessful. I wanted to go to the Container Store to pick up some organizational materials for...yes...one of my semi-resolutions. I don't usually make resolutions, but one of the ways I'm starting off this new year is cleaning/organizing and so...I guess that's a resolution. Anyway, the store's having their Elfa sale and I really didn't feel like waiting in line to purchase a couple of baskets and a container for dried pasta. I'll be back sometime during the week.

I made some delicious pasta yesterday that I may have to make again in a few days once I run out of the leftovers. I plan on cooking dinner for some friends in a few weeks, when I have some time. Tonight would be perfect though...have the windows open, lounge music playing, good conversation, theoretically tasty food and a slightly more organized living space.

But that's what happens when you live in a shoebox inside the confines of a relatively packed city. You eat on a coffeetable. I prefer to think of it as...oh, let's say bohemian. It's from my years as a Californian. I read this yoga article about trying to sit on the floor for some time every day to help open up your hip flexors. That's exactly what I'm doing. I've intended to do this.

Anyway, back to it being a beautiful day. If you live in DC, go outside and enjoy it. Because you know eventually the bitter cold will come and crush all these positive feelings. And then after the cold, the sweltering humidity. Why DC's founders couldn't move DC a little more South and not put it on swamp land is beyond me.

happy new year

Well...what'd I miss?

Sorry for the absence, but I've been on vacation for the past two weeks which has been incredibly wonderful. The only downside is that I come home around 6ish and the battery in my fire alarm is dying...so it's beeping...continually. Only every couple of minutes or so, but still. And it won't be changed until tomorrow morning, and of course, standing on my stool (even in my platform sandals) I'm much too short to even reach it and try to do anything about it.

Oh...tomorrow at work will be fun.

It's nice to be back in my own apartment, beeping fire alarm and all, but I did start missing Texas even before I got on the plane. I saw this book last night at Borders, titled something like "A Passionate Nation" or something like that, and was about Texas politics that have taken over Washington and about Texas' epic history, etc. I'd like to check it out.

More interesting notes later. Just wanted to say that I haven't dropped off the face of the planet. I was only pretending to do so.

Here's to a wonderful 2007!

observations

Today was the day for interesting observations.

Middle of the afternoon I had to run a quick errand and was walking down I street when I see this older man standing stock still in the middle of the next block...and then I see hands wrapped around him. As my light changed and I got closer, I saw this very executive looking man being hugged by a younger homeless man. By the time I was near enough to hear anything they said, the homeless man had let go and the executive was frantically trying to get to the next crosswalk. I figured he must have given him some money, but the guy still asked everyone for 37 cents (so exact).

Second, just in front of my office building, a cab hit another car while crossing the intersection. I didn't quite see it, only heard it and then saw the cab pull away a little, so I can't quite say what happened.

Oh, and the final interesting point of note, was that all of the elevators in my office building were "broken," to use the technical term of our engineer. Only in the afternoon. But when I went down to run my errand, the elevator went all the way up to the penthouse, stopping at every floor, and then back down to the lobby...again, stopping on every floor. And of course, when I went up, we first went all the way to the garage and then back up to my floor.

I always wondered what the penthouse looked like. Honestly...I kind prefer the third floor better.

there was a chill in the air

This weather is throwing me for a loop, and it's actually starting to get a little annoying. Those who actually know me, and also some may have surmised this already, but I've discovered after one winter in DC that I'm not so much of a fan of this cold weather. Therefore, my body needs time to get ready for the cold weather, sort of a...shutting down, if you will. My mind also needs to come to terms with the fact that for a few months, there will not be so much exploring the city or going out at night when the temperature drops even more.

This isn't happening. It's back up to somewhere in the 60s now. Which is great, because I can go walk around DC, but I'm a little tired of all this teasin'! I also want it to be cold (I know, contradicting myself) so that when I'm down in Texas, I will be extremely appreciative of the heat. No fun if it's the same temperature here as it is there.

Ok I'm done. The good news is that I can still walk down to the National Gallery for my postponed lecture on Picasso and won't have to take the metro. I don't like taking the metro when my destination is conceivably within walking distance. Unless it's late. Or cold.

I can't believe this is the weekend before Christmas Eve. One more week to go and then I'll be on vacation! I wasn't going to take my writing with me...but I'm starting to think that I will. I'm already imagining my favorite coffeehouses and working there to kill the afternoon hours.

National Gallery

Sort of last minute I decide I do want to attend the lecture at the National Gallery on Picasso and Matisse. The other ones I've attended have been quite interesting. So I finish getting ready and haul it down to the National Gallery (from Dupont Circle area), and make it there just in time to get in line and be sure I have a choice in seating.

I walk in the door, have my bag checked and start to head down to the auditorium. And then what do I see? A notice that the lecture is postponed until next weekend.

I guess the good thing is since I didn't want to just turn around and walk back out, I got to look through the National Gallery's East builidng for a bit, which is something I haven't done in awhile. I had no idea there were so many Picasso's here. Not sure the Matisse cut-outs interested me very much, but his paintings did.

I recommend checking out what's up currently at the Gallery. And look at the West building too. The Streets of New York exhibit is great, if it's still up. I can't remember how long that one is supposed to go for.

chill in the air

I was so incredibly cold last night it was ridiculous. My friend and I went and saw Casino Royale (second time for me) last night and then got some dinner thankfully near my apartment. It was difficult making those last two blocks home. This morning while out running an errand I saw a formation of geese overhead flying south. I guess it's truly time for me to go into my self-imposed hibernation. This Texas girl is still not ready for the cold to last more than...a week at most.

The good news is that while sequestered away in my apartment, I should have more than enough time to write, among other things. I have also played quite a bit of piano lately since I received my keyboard as an early Christmas gift the other day. I think it helps to focus creative energies on something else. After a few days of indulging my inner pianist, I wrote like a madwoman. Or...I guess I should say edited somewhat like a madwoman. I've been working on this new idea and went back and edited the little that I had.

They may raise them tough down South, but we are not brought up with defenses against the cold. Case in point: a little bit of ice, or maybe 3/4" of snow will pretty much shut down the entire city of Dallas. Here, from what I've heard, there are voluntary snow days. You're snowed in (from a Southerner's point of view) and some crazy people still decide to brave the danger for their employer. Or their paycheck.

The luck that I have of living a practically a less than 10 minute walk to work excludes me from these voluntary snow days. If I was not excluded, I would probably work from home until the groundhog sees his shadow.

metroless

There are times when I miss catching the metro. I have had some very interesting experiences and observations while sitting, or packed like one tiny little sardine, on the train. Writers observe things, and here's a prime observation opportunity that I don't partake in.

But then there are other days, that I praise my very lucky stars that I walk home from work and pour a glass of wine in the amount of time it would probably take to walk to the metro and try wait for a slightly less packed train.

I just have to pick up little gems elsewhere. Luckily this city is full of...interesting people and situations. Inspiration is everywhere.

Thanksgiving

Hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

A week ago it finally felt like the holidays. I was walking home from the National Gallery of Art with a coat and scarf, a Starbucks holiday cup, it was grey and freezing (my definition of freezing). And now this weekend it's back up to 60? I thought this was finished and it was officially freezing season? It almost doesn't feel like the holidays.

But I will be visiting Texas in less than 30 days so I'm not really complaining.

In honor of the holidays, I've started to think about what I'd like to accomplish in 2007 since, well...since it's almost 2007. Here's what I'm thinking (subject to change, of course).

1. Travel to Paris (or at least have strong, firm plans to do so in 2008).
2. Travel to Montana (perhaps not as enchanting, but I love it there)
3. Have plans to publish my novel.
4. Maybe sell one of my photographs? (something I'm thinking of venturing into: http://www.evade.org/images.htm).
5. Take French lessons to brush up
6. Finally take either salsa or flamenco class
7. See The Phantom of the Opera at Kennedy
8. Pay off some bills
9. Finally go see Mount Vernon
10. Weekend in Boston

That was actually a little rough. I was trying to think of 10 things I really wanted to do. I used to want to live in Boston, but after the winters here there's no way I could do that. But it would be wonderful to go back in the Spring and visit. If number 4 doesn't happen, then I'd like to finally go spend some time in New York.

National Novel Writing Month

Apparently this is National Novel Writing Month. I haven't joined in on it officially, but I have sort of set it as a deadline to use for another idea I've had floating around. I have about 15 pages written, but I also started this project about three months ago.

By the end of November, I'd like to have about 50,000 words down, hopefully a little more and then can begin the editing process. It'll be good to have a break from Paradise Without Heaven, though I will say this one is currently untitled. I have one tentative one, but not really much of a fan.

Wish me luck! I don't have any major events upcoming at the office, not like September and October, so I'm hoping that I'll have the time to get a lot of writing done, especially with next Friday off (Veteran's Day observed) and the Thanksgiving holiday.

You know, this is probably why November is National Novel Writing Month. Numerous days off to sit at home in a sweatshirt and pajama pants and just write.

Happy Halloween!

Can you believe it's already Halloween? and that tomorrow's the first day of November? Because I can't.

I haven't really been doing a lot of writing lately, which I feel guilty about, but I'll sit in front of a document and just...nothing comes. Or if it does, I'll reread it later and just want to completely rewrite it. I'm going to look into alternative means of creativity release, at least to give my mind a rest and yet still feel creatively productive.

If that makes sense.

I'm getting back into drawing. I used to draw and paint growing up, and then stopped for a number of years. I guess I didn't think the starving artist was me. The only thing is that I've discovered that I really miss it.

And then we'll see where my writing goes now that there is also this other little release. I think it'll be good.

names

I like to give my characters, my main characters, names that mean something and that are usually pretty unique. I think that when used correctly, this makes the character even more memorable. Although, when does that uniqueness and meaning pass into something that actually places more distance between the reader and the character?

For my current novel, my main character was initially named Salome Braquemond. Salome is a Hebrew name that means "peace," which was central to Salome's metamorphosis in the novel. However, the people who've had a chance to read it so far kept asking what it meant or how to pronounce, and let me know that they felt no connection. Granted, I thought this was a relatively common name seeing as how it's in the Bible. I haven't even really read the Bible and knew of the name.

Turns out it's not so common.

So I tried Zoë. It means "life." But every time I worked on editing, the name just didn't click. It didn't feel right. Perhaps knowing that I knew about five people with a dog with that name may have had something to do with it. Regardless, I've changed the name again to Sophie. Sophie means "wisdom," coming from Greek. So...we've gone from Salome, to Zoë, to Sophie. Peace to Life to Wisdom.

Sophie seems to work. I've told those people who have either read an earlier draft or more recent chapters and they're like "oh?! Sophie, I like that."

So it seems we have a name. But I think this just reiterates the importance of naming. As a writer, you want them to be really memorable (as it helps keep your book memorable) but you can't make them so 'memorable' that you distance your reader.

lack of writing

I always feel...different, or like something's not quite right, when I go through extended periods of not writing. That's sort of how much of September was. My office had a very large event that occupied almost my entire mind during September, and then I was house sitting for a week immediately after that and then was out of town for a couple of days. I was actually looking forward to coming back a day early and spent a good deal of last night writing.

I'm also very pleased to say that I got much done. I still have more to do, but I get tomorrow off so I'm hoping to do much more work tonight and tomorrow morning.

coffee

One of my favorite ways to spend Saturday morning is to wake up early (helped when, like last night, I slept with my window open and so was awoken promptly at 7:00am with the construction beginning next door) and make a large pot of coffee. The coffee will sustain me for the next couple of hours while I open up a manuscript and work on it...and do a little internet surfing.

Of course this morning I had no more creamer left so I had to make a quick trip to my local Starbucks. A very quick trip. I admit, I'm spoiled with a Starbucks only about three buildings down from my. Oh...the tough life of city living.

I also have a lot of revising to work on. Which of course is why I'm updating this. I'm one of those people who works best under pressure, and I've given myself a personal deadline of a week to make these changes before letting some people I know reread the opening chapters. So that means...Thursday night or so I'll be up late probably but it'll get down and (hopefully) be brilliant.

Time to get to work.